I wanted to give my friend, Terri, a standing ovation after I read her post (please see below). I could relate so well. I have been known to say that I have gratitude with an attitude. Seriously … how unrealistic to be expected to count my blessings in the same manner as I did before my personal devastation day when my world stopped turning in the same direction as those who have their complete families. Am I seriously required to profess every blessed time something good happens to another family how happy I am for them? I am human, not perfect, and sometimes I am not overjoyed to hear their good news because it makes me feel even worse that our family has lost our Amy. There! I said it! I am not always genuinely happy for others. Judge me. I don’t care.
Terri put a spin on this that I needed when she wrote:
For near ten years I have wondered what I did to chase God’s “blessing” from our house. I am now realizing that God’s blessing lives in a house of mourning. God’s blessing dwells in sorrow. If I only count my blessings that are judged good in the world, then I will miss the face of God in the heart that is broken. A grape only becomes wine when it is crushed, until then it lives a very solitary life. Crushed, it leaves its former shape and life and becomes part of a new existence.
I hope you will take the time to read Terri’s post.