Attention family and friends of fractured families! It’s not a holiday which may snap you into charity mode, but this a reminder that there are 2 days of the year so significant to those who are living without someone. Any clues? Never mind, seems many can’t figure it out so I won’t make you guess. It’s a birthday and a devastation day which might require you to look up from your cell phone and notice the date. Maybe you could write it on your calendar or set a reminder on your beloved cell phone to send a card or send a text. A phone call or visit would be golden but that may be asking too much of you! Just two fucking days. Never mind the fact that each day holds its own challenges inside the world of these fractured families. As you can see from the above photos, my Amy was indeed here and good riddance to anyone who easily forgets that when interacting with me.
This post is prompted by something I read this morning which had me seething at the world around me. Unrelated to me personally, but not totally. Yes, I have been traumatized by my own devastation day, but I have met many, many wonderful, lovely ones who bravely carry this invisible wound. You probably don’t notice their forever broken heart as they courageously go about their interactions with you as best they can so as to spare you of any discomfort.
Even after 19 months, I can not say my daughter has died without crying. Too darn bad if that makes you uncomfortable. Forgive me if I walk away if you change the subject or I decide to possibly never speak to you again. What kind of toxic fumes are being released into our environment which is making people so self-absorbed? How do we become so connected to our cell phone yet so disconnected to the hearts of others. This sure isn’t no Little House On The Prairie world. Too bad.
What guru advice is circulating which provides a philosophy which enables people to become ostriches when the going gets tough?
I wish I could be everywhere if only to offer 5 minutes of comfort on those two significant days of the year to anyone living in a world without a child or even a sibling. Sibling loss, a forgotten griever. I notice this with my own children. Amy? Oh that’s right …
If anyone ever feels alone on those two days, please contact me. firstname.lastname@example.org. I will listen. I will remember. It’s just not that difficult. I am so sorry for every family and/or friend who is not willing to do the same for you.
Love to you my warrior friends. Your child is important whether seen or unseen. Their life made a difference, regardless of the length. Their absence is noticed. Your pain is acknowledged. Your fight to survive makes me weep as I struggle to do the same. Your sorrow touches my heart regardless if you are a stranger or friend.
Always remembering Amy and every child, brother or sister who exists on the other side of the veil.